Made For More

“Whatever difficulties you face, I believe you are made for more.” ~ Lisa Osteen Comes

Life doesn’t always feel like much. Sometimes, we find ourselves plodding along slowly like a robot. Not living. J. u. s. t. e.x.i.s.t.i.n.g.

Every day, every week, every month… it’s just doing the same things over and over again.

You. are made for more.

There’s a whole dimension of fulfilment to be found within the seemingly meaningless rote of living.

I’m there with you. I’ve found myself mindlessly carrying out routines. Overcommitting. Trying so hard to be as much as I can.

Or not?

It just wore me out.

I hide years of pain, hurt, and suffering deep within me, and it seems almost impossible to do something about it. The very thought of sorting through those old memories, and wounds, and tears- it’s daunting.

large

While that may not be true for everyone, it is for me. The times when I tried the hardest to lift people up were the times when I needed it the most. I found a fulfilment, a blissful satisfaction in seeing a smile on someone’s face when the very smile on my face was my temporary refuge.

My dear friend, you were made for more. Don’t fall into the trap of dull protocols and lifeless actions. If you, like me, have already been caught in that trap, I challenge you to embark on this journey with me.

Life is tough. No one ever told us life would be like this, did they?

It’s full of trials, grief, and goodness knows what else.

Impossible deadlines to meet. A mile-long to-do list. The death of a loved one. Saying goodbye to a best friend. The death of a lifelong dream. The pain of a broken relationship. Tension within the family. The weight of realising how messed-up you are.

The list could go on and on.

But like they’ve always said, it’s the response that matters.

You may be facing a situation, and this may simply not mean anything to you because you’ve heard it a thousand times. It’s all right.

Like I said, hang on.

Pick up those pieces again. It may take months- years- decades- a lifetime.

But it’s a journey we’re on together. It’s a battle we all face.

You were made for more, my friend. Don’t give up.

Advertisements

Dear Girl // Hang On

You know what it’s like when you’re sick and are recovering, only to fall sick again? You know what it feels like when it seems like you’ll never get well?

You know what it’s like to go through the deepest, darkest part of you life?

Yes?

You know what it’s like to think you overcame it– that things were getting better, only to find yourself crashing. again?

Yes? So do I.

When everything is a mess. when you don’t see a way out. When there’s nothing more to live for.

Yes?

When you become numb. When you silently cry out for help. When you realise you’re alone in this.

Yes?

When you have lost control of yourself. When there’s no more hope. When your heart bleeds so profusely you can barely feel anything else.

Yes?

I know. It hurts. a. lot.

And the greatest pain is in watching everyone else live a “normal” life while you are drowning– gasping for breath and pleading for help– but having to hide it all, knowing no one will understand.

Yes?

I feel you.

Dear girl, don’t give up. I know you’ve heard this a billion times, but I’m still going to say it.

Hang on. Hang on with every last bit of you. Don’t ever give up.

Saying “things’ll get better” doesn’t help– I know– so I won’t say that.

But know this, dear girl. There’s a soul out here who feels you. You are not alone. You are loved. Perhaps by no one else, but I love you.

You may have suffered at the hands of people– Christians– and have determined to hate this God who doesn’t even attempt to make things better. I don’t know what you’ve been through. If you’ve met a Christian and realised he/she was a hypocrite, I’m sorry.

I know I’m not perfect. I don’t do the slightest bit of justice to the Christian faith because of who I am.

But God still loves me. And He loves you. Wait. Don’t click that button to close this window.

I’ve questioned how He could love me despite me being the wreck I am. I’ve rejected Him– spurned Him– hated Him, even.

Yet, He is faithful. I can’t say how things will work out.

But He has brought me safe thus far.

Depression and anxiety are in no way pleasant. It’s torture. Torture to the farthest extent of the soul.

But, dear girl, don’t do anything else to yourself. This is a note to myself, too.

Don’t, dear girl. Don’t. Don’t do anything to yourself. Hang on. I love you. God does, too.

And here‘s something I’d like to share with you. 🙂 I love you, dear girl. Hang on.

Dear Girl // Because Life is Fragile

Life is fragile.

Life. Is. Fragile.

The word fragile swims in my mind. As I picture a pair of hands probing some mysterious crystal with the gentlest touch, I am brought back to that moment when I first read WOYS’ blog, “The Journey.” Perhaps I’ve never actually recorded this, but it was her blog– that artfully simple, yet strikingly honest form of expression– that inspired me to do the same. It doesn’t have to be fancy or anything– just a journal where I can express myself and just be me. Sometimes, comfort can be found in the simplest of things– pen and paper. I loved those subtle messages that I wove and sprinkled my poems generously with– it reminded me of a word’s worth– how much just a few alphabets can mean.

But I’m diverging. Life is fragile. It really is.

Life can go– just like that. Cancer, illness, suicide, murder, accidents– you name it. And sometimes, you just have to let it go.

It is that precious. It is that fragile.

Fragile enough to shatter with a thoughtless action.

Fragile enough to shatter with an ignorant look.

Fragile enough to shatter with words. Yes, words.

That’s why life needs to be handled with utmost care.

Don’t take it for-granted, dear girl.

Acknowledge and cherish the fact that you are alive for yet another day, no matter how painful it may be.

Life is fragile.

It can be gone.

Just like that.

Just another patient. Just another driver. Just another abortion. Just another suicide.

Life is fragile.

Don’t shatter another life by shattering your own. Don’t.

I know what it’s like– that unbearable agony that crushes you and rams you against the wall of hopelessness, leaving you gasping for air. Yes, I know. You see no way out.

But hang on a little longer, dear girl.

Because that little moment can mean a lot.

It will mean a lot to me.

Don’t do it. I love you.

Life is fragile.

I’m here for you. Go out there on the battlefield.

Go fight.

Go help build someone up.

Because life is fragile.